


Come back home

by Vanilla_Sunshine



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: AU in the 90's, Childhood Friends, Coming of Age, Eventual Smut, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Mikasa's parents are diplomats, Mutual Pining, eren is an angry drunk, long distance relationship thing, mikasa is not his sister, mild incest jokes, people still send postcards, pls bare with me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 09:15:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29964177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vanilla_Sunshine/pseuds/Vanilla_Sunshine
Summary: Eren always thought of Mikasa as a sister. But when Mikasa leaves for a couple of years to accompany her parents in their diplomatic travels, he begins to realize how much he misses her company in ways he had never expected. One day, she returns, and Eren is forced to face his feelings. One thing is for sure though, and that is Eren no longer sees her the way he did when they were kids. Before he leaves the province for college, he decides to settle their relationship once and for all.Eventual smut. One chapter of pining. I try to make it as fast-paced as I can.
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman/Eren Yeager
Comments: 18
Kudos: 62





	Come back home

Eren was ten years old when he asked his parents why Mikasa didn’t look like them. “Isn’t she my sister?”, he thought, because Mikasa had lived with them for as long as he could remember. He forgot that Mikasa had her own parents, traveling from country to country because of their work as ambassadors. He forgot that she looked like them and that this meant she was their daughter. He had seen them once, but only a glimpse from his bedroom window. And from up where he was, he forgot that he had seen a little girl he never saw before because after years had passed, he was only used to seeing her every day. So, by the time Eren turned thirteen years old, he felt an odd twist in his stomach upon hearing the news of Mikasa leaving their home to follow along her parents’ travels abroad. They finally deemed her old enough, and they were going to take her back. Just like that. 

“Eren, don’t go anywhere near Jean’s classroom, otherwise he and his friends might gang up on you again. I won’t be there to prote--” 

“Could you stop talking about me for once?” He turned to face her, soft anger lining his features. “You’re leaving tomorrow. Isn’t there anything else you’d like to say?” 

They were in Eren’s bedroom -- well, their shared bedroom -- sitting against the wall next to their closet. It was already half empty. Eren didn’t want to admit that this fact bothered him. This was right, he thought, it was right for her to return to her real parents. 

“It’s going to be cold,” Mikasa muttered under her breath, “ we’re going to Russia first, and then Switzerland.” 

“Are you happy?” He suddenly asked. 

Mikasa shook her head slightly, “I just want to be here, at home.”

Eren reached out to the red scarf that hung from a hook attached to the side of their closet. He wrapped it around her neck and after a moment of hesitation, Eren leaned forward and embraced her.

“You’ll always be at home.” He said. 

Mikasa’s eyes watered a bit, the tension on her shoulders beginning to melt away. She returned the gesture and tried to hide the blush that rose to her cheeks. 

They were thirteen years old, and from all the years they spent together up until that point, Mikasa had never thought of Eren the way he did with her. “Isn’t Mikasa my sister?” he asked his parents back then. She felt her chest swell in a mixture of joy and disappointment. The moment he held her tight, the memory played again in her head, and her tears began to fall. 

“Mikasa, why are you crying?” 

He didn’t know. He was never going to know, she thought, and that was okay. Mikasa bore a heavy gaze towards Eren and engraved in her memory the way his turquoise eyes glazed under the yellow light of their bedroom. 

“I’ll miss you,” she said. 

The days at school that followed after Mikasa left were different, to say the least. She wasn’t there to wake him up anymore, and when he went to school late one morning, he was immediately caught by his teacher and punished with two hours of detention. In the detention room, he met eyes with Jean, the school bully. It always seemed like Jean had something to prove against Eren, especially when Mikasa was around. 

“Where’s your sister, Jaeger?” He asked, after an hour of silence. The teacher assigned to watch over them had fallen asleep on his desk. 

“Watch yourself horse-face. I’m not in the mood.” 

“Since when did I care about your mood.” 

“What the hell is your problem.”

“I asked where Mikasa is, you a-hole. You didn’t answer my damn question.” Jean growled. He seemed to seriously want to know. 

Eren sighed, “She left.” 

“What do you mean she left?” Jean asked, “Your sister doesn’t go anywhere that doesn’t have you in it.” 

“Her real parents took her and they left. She’s not my sister. She was just… she lived with us.” 

Jean released a scoff and stretched his back against the chair, yawning. “So you guys aren’t brother and sister, huh. Why did the gods let you of all people share the same living space as Mikasa? If I were you, I’d have probably… used up all my luck with her.” 

Eren whipped his head towards Jean with a violent scowl on his face, “Shut up, you pervert! That’s weird!” 

“Is it really? You’re technically not related to each other.” Jean said, “Look, I like your sist-- I mean Mikasa. That’s not supposed to come off as a surprise. She’s strong and tough, and her punches… well they could send me straight to hell and I’d enjoy it.” 

“What do you like about Mikasa, anyway?” Eren asked. 

“You wouldn’t understand, Jaeger. You’re probably too used to her presence. You don’t see her the way I do.” Jean said, resting his cheek over his palm. He stared up at the ceiling. “She has beautiful jet black hair at just the right feminine length. She doesn’t smile often, so when she does, it’s like magic. Her eyes are cold but beautiful. I could stare at them for days.” 

“Didn’t know you were that cheesy.” 

“Shut up.” Jean sighed, “Oh how I wish to be in your place. You don’t know how lucky you are, Jaeger.” 

Eren furrowed his eyebrows and looked down at his desk. When he returned home, he sat on the bed next to his. It was Mikasa’s bed. He remembered when he saw her cry the night before she left. She clutched onto the red scarf and kept it close to her more than he expected. Was she still crying right now, he wondered. Was she feeling lonely? He laid down and rested his head on her pillow. It was powder pink, and it smelled just like her shampoo. He felt a tug on his chest, a heavy one. “I’ll miss you,” she said to him. Why did that affect him so much? 

He heard a knocking on his door, and he instantly stood up from the bed. His mother walked in with a bright smile and a postcard in hand. 

“Something came in the mail. It’s from Mikasa!” 

Eren’s eyes lit up and he sped to his mom, grabbing the postcard out of her hand. At the front was a picture of the Winter Palace from Moscow, and at the back, it said, “Thank you for the scarf. It really is cold here. I hope everyone is okay. I miss you, Eren. Take care always. I love you.” 

Eren couldn’t understand why it felt like his heart had flown out of his chest. This was the first time she said, “I love you”. They both knew they loved each other, but it felt different materialized into words. Something strange began to stir inside Eren, something he had never felt before. 

Mikasa would send over postcards and pictures at least once a week, and although she seldom sent photos of herself, there were times when Eren would catch a glimpse of her eyes, the side of her face, or a fringe of her hair. Unlike her, he’d send back a good number of photos with himself and his parents; a dozen were sent every year -- those from Christmas Day, New Year’s Eve, and his birthdays. 

Somewhere deep inside, he wanted to see more of her through those photographs -- more of her jet black hair, more of her smiles, more of her cold but sincere eyes. He wondered if this was what Jean meant about seeing Mikasa differently. Eren pinned each photo with Mikasa on his wall, and he’d stare for a while, wondering when he’d begun to look for crumbs of her presence as if she hadn’t lived with him nearly their entire lives. 

On his fifteenth birthday, Mikasa’s mail came with a package. He opened it to see a sweater and a thick envelope. Inside the envelope were photographs of her, her parents, and the friends that she met abroad, all of which were diverse. Eren flipped through them, his heart pounding from seeing so many clear images of Mikasa. Her hair had grown longer, her lips were colored a light rose hue -- had she begun to wear make-up? Her smile looked friendlier, and it seemed Mikasa had grown more mature, more beautiful, and -- Eren held his breath. 

There was a boy next to her in one of the pictures. His arm was around her shoulders. Mikasa didn’t let just anyone touch her, especially a boy. 

Months following after his birthday, he didn’t receive anything from Mikasa. No photo, no postcard, nothing. He wondered if she still thought of him the way she always did. Even though he was annoyed most of the time by her overprotectiveness, it was the only memory of closeness he had with her. Had he ever tried to actually know her? The other boy had blonde hair, and his eyes were wide with a light blue shade. For a second, he had thought he was a girl, but there was no doubt with his stature. “Why was Mikasa being so close to this boy?”, Eren thought to himself. 

“Are they dating? They couldn’t be. Mikasa wouldn’t--” 

He didn’t allow himself to finish that sentence. How would he know what Mikasa would or wouldn’t do? 

At this point, it became clear to Eren that his feelings for Mikasa had changed. He couldn’t stop thinking about her, what she was doing, and who she was with. There was an ache in his chest that wouldn’t go away, and he sank to the floor with Mikasa’s photo in hand. He stared at her face and saw the child behind the image -- the Mikasa he was with all the time. Eren missed her so much, but now he had to come to terms with the idea that she no longer felt the same. “I love you,” she said before. He should have said it back. 

By the time he suffered from his first failed relationship, he was eighteen and just fresh out of high school. He was spending the rest of summer vacation in his room, reading and re-reading his acceptance letter to a University from the city. He couldn’t believe he had passed, and soon he found himself calling Jean up for a drink. 

“Well you’re having the time of your life,” Jean told Eren as he took a sip of bourbon. He waved his hand at the bartender, “Another one for this guy!” 

Eren swallowed a whole glass in one gulp and slammed it back on the table, his cheeks tinted red.

“Slow down, Jaeger! I don’t want to have to carry you on my back on the way to your house.”

“Shut up horse-face you’re too loud.” 

Jean rolled his eyes and pat Eren’s back, “This isn’t a celebration. You’re still hung up on Historia, aren’t you.” 

“I told you, I’m over her. It wasn’t a good match anyway. It turned out she swung the other way, and I had no problem with that.” Eren said. 

“Then why’d you get into a relationship with her in the first place? Doesn’t look like you were all that interested.” 

“Who knows.” 

Jean took another sip and threw a sideways glance at Eren, “is it because of your sister?” 

Eren slammed the table again, “Stop calling her my sister!” 

He heaved a huff and scowled. His face folded in anger. After a while, he combed his hair back with his hand. It had grown a lot since he was fifteen that he had to tie it in a bun, but everything was loose and falling apart. Eren realized he was an angry kind of drunk, and this wasn’t good whenever he was in public. Some people started to stare at him. 

“I don’t like Mikasa that way.” He said, more calmly, “Why’d you think that?” 

Jean shook his head with a slight sneer, “You can’t remember the first time we drank in your place? You couldn’t stop talking about this blonde boy in a picture Mikasa sent you. I actually had to restrain you from breaking anything in your house! The next day, you didn’t want to talk about it again, so I didn’t push.” 

Eren hunched over the table with a massive sigh. 

“If it bothers you so much until now, why don’t you give her a call?” 

“She wouldn’t want to talk to me.” 

“How do you know that?” 

“Because…” Eren furrowed his brows as he looked down at the table, “there’s someone else who’s important to her now. Even if she did pick up, it would be just wasted time on her part. She’s the kind of person who transfers her dedication purely to one person at a time. She rarely writes back nowadays, and that can only mean one thing. She’s given her attention to someone else. I don’t want to… be some nuisance.” 

Jean massaged his temples and groaned, “Oh my god you’re such a pain.” 

Eren glared at him, “What a friend you are.” 

“Just try it. Doesn’t matter if you’re a nuisance or not. You’re only going to keep being restless like this if you don’t do anything. It’s been three years, Jaeger. Three years. Make a move this time.” he said, resting his cheek against his palm, “Maybe she’s just been waiting.” 

Eren shook his head, “I don’t know what kind of fantasy you live in your head Jean, but that’s… no. That’s not Mikasa.” 

“Well, there’s no changing your mind I guess.” 

Jean didn’t need to carry Eren back to his house this time, though they tripped several times along the way. When Eren plopped down on his bed, he turned to face the pictures of Mikasa littered on his wall. He asked himself if it was worth it to try just as Jean said. He wasn’t one to follow any of Jean's advice, but he was right. He loved Mikasa and still does, not as a sister as he had once thought, but as the person she is. Clouded with memories of her, he could feel his heart sink again. He stood up and went downstairs to the telephone. 

He picked it up and hovered his hand over to dial, but he stopped himself. 

“C’mon Eren. Just do it.” He muttered to himself. 

He breathed in and breathed out, and after a few seconds, he reached for the telephone again. 

Suddenly, the telephone rang. 

“Darling, can you get that for me?” His mother yelled out from the kitchen. 

Eren picked up the phone, “Hello?” 

There was a pause. 

“Eren, is that you?” 

Eren widened his eyes at the sound of her voice, “Mikasa… It’s me, yes.” He said, “Is there, uh, something you need?” 

“I… I’m going back home.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this far! It's my first eremika fic so please be kind <3 <3 Kudos and comments are much appreciated.


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